My birthday came up, but two days before hand, I received
another call from the hospital.
“I’m very sorry Mr. Jones, but we’re going to have to cancel
your appointment.”
“This is the second time it’s been cancelled.”
“Oh, I am sorry. You’ll receive a new date shortly.”
“This is the second time it’s been cancelled.”
“Oh, I am sorry. You’ll receive a new date shortly.”
“Oh, but-“
“Bye.”
*Click*
”Oh.”
At least they’d given me a little more notice (48 hours rather than 24), and as an upside, I got to open my presents on time, and we went out for a meal and saw a film in the evening, which was nice.
More depreparation at work, more emails sent out to cancel the emails I’d already sent, uncancelling the cancelled emails I’d emailed before.
A couple of days later, I got a date, only a couple of week down the line. However, I did have to go back in for another pre-assessment, since the previous one was now too previous. Another trip down into London, and again I was presented with the enormous cotton wool buds and made to swab my nose and groin. Another trip down to the haemomancy department to be stabbed and drained of a hand’s worth of blood or so. I will say though that the vein-stabber was one of the most skilled I’ve yet encountered, and the insertion of the pipe into my vein was little more than a slight pinprick.
Happily they didn’t feel the need to repeat my errant tectonics, so I was able to escape relatively quickly.
At the time of writing, I am due in tomorrow, and they have not recancelled the uncancelled cancelled cancellation that I had to cancel due to the cancellation of my cancelled operation.
I have a checklist of things I need to remember to do:
“Bye.”
*Click*
”Oh.”
At least they’d given me a little more notice (48 hours rather than 24), and as an upside, I got to open my presents on time, and we went out for a meal and saw a film in the evening, which was nice.
More depreparation at work, more emails sent out to cancel the emails I’d already sent, uncancelling the cancelled emails I’d emailed before.
A couple of days later, I got a date, only a couple of week down the line. However, I did have to go back in for another pre-assessment, since the previous one was now too previous. Another trip down into London, and again I was presented with the enormous cotton wool buds and made to swab my nose and groin. Another trip down to the haemomancy department to be stabbed and drained of a hand’s worth of blood or so. I will say though that the vein-stabber was one of the most skilled I’ve yet encountered, and the insertion of the pipe into my vein was little more than a slight pinprick.
Happily they didn’t feel the need to repeat my errant tectonics, so I was able to escape relatively quickly.
At the time of writing, I am due in tomorrow, and they have not recancelled the uncancelled cancelled cancellation that I had to cancel due to the cancellation of my cancelled operation.
I have a checklist of things I need to remember to do:
- Ask the person fitting the spine drain if they’re a lumbar jack.
- Upon waking up post-op, ask if the brain tumour has been successfully removed. When told yes, say, ‘Well that’s a weight off my mind.’
- Upon my first encounter with the
consultant after the operation, say ‘Don’t take this the wrong way Doc, but you
really get up my nose’.
- Say, ‘Well it’s not exactly brain surgery is it?’ every single time they tell me something about my operation. They probably won’t have heard this before, and it will no doubt amuse them greatly, and endear me to them, guaranteeing excellent treatment, swift recovery and speedy escape from the hospital.
So, it’s (currently…) on for tomorrow. Wish me luck, and I’ll file a report once I’m feeling up to it.
Good luck, dear boy! :)
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